World Kindness Youth Conference (W.K.Y.C.) Celebrates 9 Years! | Corona, CA

simple acts of care and kindness

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Simple Acts of Care and Kindness kicked off its annual World Kindness Youth Conference again this year at Crossroads Christian Church.  This two-day event gets bigger and better each year and the singers, speakers and sensitivity camp exhibits were amazing!

A huge “Thank you” to all of our 4th graders and teachers who participated in the event as well as all of our volunteers who make this event happen.  We couldn’t do it without you.

The W.K.Y.C. was first held in 2004 and uses seminars and activities to help students learn the many areas of life into which care and kindness can be inserted. Seminars and discussion groups dealing with bullying and other relationship topics fill the morning. After lunch, students visit exhibitors who have come with messages about care and kindness for themselves (staying health with good food and physical activity), their family (anger management, safety, emergency procedures at home), their community (programs for the developmentally disabled, helping keep parks clean and green…), and their world (recycling, planting trees…).

Contact Simple Acts of Care and Kindness today at 866-459-7225 or visit our website for more information.

Simple Acts of Care and Kindness proudly serves Norco, Riverside, Lake Elsinore, San Bernardino, Eastvale and surrounding areas.

 

What can be done to help someone who is being bullied? | Norco, CA

Support a child who is being bullied:

  • You can listen to the child and let him or her know you are available to talk or even help. A child who is being bullied may struggle talking about it. Consider letting the child know there are other people who can talk with him or her about bullying.
  • Give the child advice about what he or she can do. You might want to include role-playing and acting out a bullying incident as you guide the child so that the child knows what to do in a real situation.
  • Follow up with the child to show that you are committed to helping put a stop to the bullying.

Address the bullying behavior:

  • Make sure a child whom you suspect or know is bullying knows what the problem behavior is and why it is not acceptable.
  • Show kids that bullying is taken seriously. If you know someone is being a bully to someone else, tell the bully that bullying will not be tolerated! It is important, however, to demonstrate good behavior when speaking with a bully so that you serve as a role model of good interpersonal behavior.

If you feel that you have taken all possible steps to prevent bullying and nothing has worked, or someone is in immediate danger, there are other ways for you to help.

The problem

What you can do

A crime has occurred or someone is at immediate risk of harm. Call 911.
Someone is feeling hopeless, helpless, or thinking of suicide. Contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline online or at 1-800-273-TALK (8255). This toll-free call goes to the nearest crisis center in a national network. These centers provide crisis counseling and mental health referrals.
Someone is acting differently, such as sad or anxious, having trouble completing tasks, or not taking care of themselves. Find a local counselor or other mental health services.
A child is being bullied in school. Contact the:

  • Teacher
  • School counselor
  • School coach
  • School principal
  • School superintendent
  • Board of Education
Child is being bullied after school on the playground or in the neighborhood
  • Neighborhood watch
  • Playground security
  • Team coach
  • Local precinct/community police
The child’s school is not addressing the bullying Contact the:

  • School superintendent
  • Local Board of Education
  • State Department of Education

 

“One’s dignity may be assaulted, vandalized and cruelly mocked, but it can never be taken away unless it is surrendered.”
― Michael J. Fox, Actor

 

 

For more information about how you can help call us at 866-459-7225 or visit our website at http://simpleacts.org

S.A.C.K. also proudly serves Corona, Riverside, Norco, San Bernardino, and surrounding areas.

Bully Intervention- When YOU see or hear bullying . . . | Riverside, CA

When YOU see or hear bullying . . .

Intervene immediately. When you do nothing, you send the message that bullying is  acceptable. If you ignore or minimize the issue, victims will not believe that adults understand or care, or that they can help. If you don’t intervene, children won’t either.

Intervene even if you’re not sure it’s bullying. Observing children’s actions, words, body language, and facial expressions will help you determine if bullying is occurring. Even if it’s not, aggressive behaviors need to be stopped.

Stand between or near the victim and the bully, separating them if necessary, so as to stop the bullying behaviors. For young children, consider removing them from the situation to a “time-out” area or room.

Respond firmly but appropriately. Remain calm, but convey the seriousness of the situation. Announce that the bullying must stop. Describe the behavior you observed and why it is unacceptable.

Get help if needed. If the bully is using physical force, or there is more than one bully, you may need to find another adult to help keep children safe and protect yourself.

Do not respond aggressively. Using aggressive behavior sends the wrong message that this is a good way to solve problems. It may also prompt a bully or a bystander to increase his or her bullying behavior or become aggressive toward you.

Avoid lecturing the bully in front of his or her peers. Your goal is to end the behavior, not humiliate or shame the bully. Rather than serving as a deterrent, lecturing and scolding often provide the bully with attention that he or she finds rewarding.

Don’t impose immediate consequences. Allow yourself time to consider the incident and obtain any clarifying information—then decide the best course of action.

Don’t ask children to “work things out” for themselves.  Bullying is different from an argument or conflict; it involves a power imbalance that requires adult intervention.

Give praise and show appreciation to helpful bystanders.  Children who try to help the victim or stop the bully are key to bullying prevention.

Stick around. Remain in the area until you are sure the behavior has stopped.

“Go ahead, bully me; but in 30 years, the only thing people will remember is that I am your boss”
― J.E. Allotey, Author

For more information about how you can help call us at 866-459-7225 or visit our website at http://simpleacts.org

There are 5 reasons kids may not ask for help when being bullied | San Bernardino, CA

Most people reading this information right now know a child who has stayed home from school this week because they were afraid of being bullied – but you may not realize it. The estimations are that an average of 160,000 students around the country stay home daily out of fear of being bullied each day. But adults, for many of reasons, have no idea that the bullying is taking place.

For those parents and adults who may be wondering why the children are not telling them that they are bullied, there are 5 universal reasons:

  1. They have been taught not to tattle and often think that they are tattling on the bully. It is vitally important that children learn the difference between tattling about unimportant things and telling someone when bullying is taking place.
  2. Children may fear retaliation especially if they tell an adult they are being bullied. While the adult may be able to address the issue with the child doing the bullying, there will probably be another time right around the corner when the adult is there to help. Children may fear that things could escalate if the issue is addressed.
  3. Some children feel that they will not be listened to and that the issue will not be believed. They think that they will tell an adult and that person will not believe them or will suggest that maybe they did something to bring the bullying on themselves.
  4. A majority of children believe that telling an adult does nothing to stop the bullying. Sadly, research tends to support this thought. Many adults don’t do anything about the bullying, or they simply brush it off.  Often kids are told to “toughen up”, or “that it is just a part of growing up”. If children learn that adults won’t help, then they are not very likely to report the incidents.
  5. When children are bullied, they often feel ashamed or embarrassed. These feelings alone can keep them from reporting issues, because they don’t want people to know that they were being bullied.

Around half children who are being bullied don’t end up telling an adult that it’s happening. The more we as parents and adults can understand about the issues and address the reasons behind them not telling, the easier it will be to help solve the bullying problem our nation’s children and schools facing.

The challenges that children face when not telling adults that they are being bullied can be dealt with and defeated. This can happen by having a bully prevention program in place in every school, as well as parents and adults talking to children about bullying and the importance of telling someone in authority when it happens. It is also vitally important that when children do tell adults about bullying that it is addressed in a positive manner so that they feel confident in their decision to report it the next time it happens.

Bullying builds character like nuclear waste creates superheroes. It’s a rare occurrence and often does much more damage than endowment.”
― Zack W. Van, Author

For more information about how you can help call us at 866-459-7225 or visit our website at http://simpleacts.org

4 Easy Steps We Can All Take To Stop Bullying | San Bernardino, CA

To begin to foster a society of caring, respect, and awareness starts with a few steps that are simple but can make the biggest change possible.

1. Increasing Your Own Awareness

Recognizing when bullying is taking place is an important first step in finding solutions.  By understanding the reason and roots of the problem, you will begin to form an idea of how to start proactively working to address bullying.  This includes teasing, name-calling, shunning, and physical intimidation or assault.  Does your school, sports club, or youth group create a culture of respect, caring, and safety for everyone?  Are children supervised appropriately during recess, lunch and before and after school?  Do educators and staff have adequate support and training for addressing bullying and recognize the different forms that bullying can appear as?

2. Respond To Situations Forcefully but Respectfully

When you see bullying taking place or hear about it, remember that your reactions provide a framework for how the kids involved will respond to and understand the situation.  Children need to see adults being powerful and respectful in reacting to problems.  If adults in charge get upset and overreact, children are more likely to imitate adult actions and might even avoid telling adults about future situations.  Staying calm, respectful, and persistent will make you more effective in talking to children in bullying situations.

3. Teach Your Kids Defensive Skills

Positive peer to peer relationship skills help to put a stop to bullying.  Teach children that they have the confidence and power to walk away from any situation.  They can make safe choices like stepping out of a line or changing seats.  Sometimes all that is needed to make bullying problem stop.  Ensure that your child is active in getting help and is prepared to continue to ask for help even if an adult does not respond immediately to the situation.

4. Become Involved

Keep yourself informed as to what other parents and adults in your community are doing to stop bullying.  Insist that your child’s school and school district has a mandatory district-wide anti-bullying policy and that they educate their staff on how to stop bullying and recognizing all forms and types of youth bullying.  Write to your county- and state-level officials and tell them of the seriousness of bullying and demand they make it a top priority in their campaigns.

“I would rather be a little nobody, then to be a evil somebody.”
― Abraham Lincoln

For more information about how you can help call us at 866-459-7225 or visit our website at http://simpleacts.org

Bullying Facts and Solutions | Riverside, CA

With as much media attention as has been given to the sometimes tragic consequences of bullying, one only has to read the comments section of online articles about bullying to really see that many adults still don’t fully comprehend the negative impact that bullying has on so many children every day.

Below you will find some facts and statistics to help adults and parents come to realize bullying is a big problem for not only their community but, likewise, across the entire country.

Bullying Facts and Statistics

  • Because of bullying, 160,000 kids in the US stay home from school every day.
  • 83% of bullying incidents receive no intervention and continue to happen.
  • Bullies are four times more likely to engage in criminal behavior as an adult and often develop suicidal thoughts.
  • Male bullying more often consists of verbal and physical abuse, whereas female bullyies more commonly use more verbal abuse and social bullying by spreading of rumors.
  • Only half of educators have received training on how to handle bullying situations. That is like going to a dentist to get treated for the flu!
  • In a 2007 report it showed that nearly 80% of students who experienced bullying stated that it occurred inside the school grounds.
  • Verbal assaults amongst children more often target appearances and behaviors rather than race or religious affiliations. Often in those instances, the bullies felt that the victim was at fault for these behaviors or appearances.
  • 33.1% of middle and high school students surveyed agree or strongly agrees that teachers can stop bullying.  And 2/3 of these students are not confident that they can get help from their teachers.
  • A study conducted in 2005 showed that approximately one out of ten Internet users aged 10-17 had been the victim of cyber bullying and “on-line harassment”.  Half of victims who were bullied off-line and on-line by the same people reported being very distressed by the incidents.

“If you are neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor. If an elephant has its foot on the tail of a mouse, and you say that you are neutral, the mouse will not appreciate your neutrality.”
― Desmond Tutu

 

For more information about how you can help call us at 866-459-7225 or visit our website at http://simpleacts.org

The Evolution of a Bully | Corona, CA

Bullying is about the abuse of power. Children who bully abuse their power to hurt others, deliberately and repeatedly. They are often hot-tempered, inflexible, overly confident, and don’t like to follow rules. Often they lack empathy and many also like inflicting pain on others. They often seek out to dominate and control others.  They perceive hostile intent where there isn’t one.  Overreact aggressively to ambiguous situations, and hold beliefs that support violence.

In the preschool years, bullies often use direct verbal bullying and physical power to control material objects or territory. They may not have the skills necessary to interact in socially appropriate ways.

In the elementary school years, bullies are more inclined to use threats and physical force.  It is also combined with direct verbal bullying, to make victims do things that they do not want to do. During this time period, some children may begin to use indirect bullying to exclude peers from their social circle and activities.

In the middle and high school years, bullies rely on direct verbal bullying such as name-calling and making threatening remarks.  Quite often this includes physical bullying such as pushing and hitting. Both boys and girls engage in physical bullying.  But unlike boys, girls are more likely to participate in indirect, relational bullying,  that often includes rumor-spreading and social exclusion. Use of the Internet or cell phones to send these hurtful messages takes a lead role. Boys during this time tend to rely on bullying to enhance their physical dominance, girls tend to use it to enhance their social status.

Children also bully in groups. Children may join in because they look up to the bully and want to impress him or her.  Often though it is because they are afraid and do not want to be attacked themselves.

The Effects on The Bully

Besides hurting others, bullies hurt themselves. Each time a bully hurts another child, they become more and more removed emotionally from the suffering and pain of their victims. They begin to justify their actions to themselves by believing their victims deserve to be bullied. They start to believe that the way to get what they want from others is through force. Bullies fail to develop the social skills necessary for sharing, reciprocating, empathizing, and negotiating.  These items form the basis for lasting friendships.

As they mature into adulthood, children who have bullied others often show higher rates of:

  • Aggression
  • Antisocial behavior
  • Carrying weapons to school
  • Dropping out of high school
  • Convictions for crime
  • Difficulty controlling their emotions
  • Traffic violations
  • Convictions for drunk driving
  • Depression
  • Suicides

Some Adults who have been bullied as children may be more likely to allow their own children to bully others, thus raising a new generation of bullies.

If Bullies can change these patterns of behavior before they become habitual and entrenched, will be less likely to suffer with these devastating and long-term effects . when When Bullying prevention strategies are applied early to children who are young or have just begun to bully others it is most effective —the earlier the better. It’s never too late to change a bully’s patterns of behavior.  These habitual patterns are usually much more difficult to change in later years.

Starting in the preschool years, adults can teach children many social skills that are important to bully prevention and help guide children as they practice using these skills. The Social skills that form an important foundation for bullying prevention include:

  • Solving social problems
  • Sharing voluntarily
  • Interacting assertively
  • Showing empathy toward other

For more information about how you can help call us at 866-459-7225 or visit our website at http://simpleacts.org

Recognizing Bullying Types | Corona, CA

There are four main types of bullying:

Verbal bullying: When a person uses name calling, jokes about or offensive remarks about a persons religion, gender, ethnicity, appearance or socioeconomic status.

Social bullying or Alienation: This is done by spreading fake news or doing wrong propaganda about something, disturbing someones positive activities or fight with friends.  Often pointing out differences in others, excluding others from a group, and spreading rumors.

Physical bullying: In this type the victims body is physically hurt.  This can be any physical contact that hurts a person using physical means such as hitting, kicking, thrown objects or punching.

 Cyber bullying: Spreading rumors or insults using emails, blogs, websites or social networks like Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, MySpace, etc.  This more than often includes sending pictures, messages or information using electronic media, computers and cell phones.

 

There are also two other types of bullying that are often forgotten about but are just as harmful.

Indirect Bullying: This is done by excluding others from a group, spreading lies, secrets, rumors or exaggerated stories about someone.

Intimidation Bullying:  These bullies use threats to frighten others.

For more information about how you can help call us at 866-459-7225 or visit our website at http://simpleacts.org

Bullying by the Numbers | Corona, CA

School bullying statistics in the United States show that about one in four kids in the U.S. are bullied on a regular basis. Between cyber bullying and bullying at school, the school bullying statistics illustrate a huge problem with bullying and the American school system. 

Here are some other statistics to think about:

  1. 56% of students have personally felt some sort of bullying at school. Between 4th and 8th grade in particular, 90% of students are victims of bullying.
  2. The most common reason cited for being harassed is a student’s appearance or body size. 2 out of 5 teens feel that they are bullied because of the way that they look.
  3. 1 in 4 teachers see nothing wrong with bullying and will only intervene 4% percent of the time.
  4. A victim of bullying is twice as likely to take his or her own life compared to someone who is not a victim.
  5. One out of 10 students drop out of school because they are bullied.
  6. Physical bullying peak in middle school and declines in high school. Verbal abuse rates remain constant from elementary to high school.
  7. Researchers feel that bullying should not be treated as part of growing up (with the attitude “kids will be kids”).
  8. 57% of students who experience harassment in school never report the incident to the school. 10% of those who do not report stay quiet because they do not believe that teachers or staff can do anything. As a result, more than a quarter of students feel that school is an unsafe place to be.
  9. Schools with easily understood rules of conduct, smaller class sizes and fair discipline practices report less violence than those without such features.

 These numbers are too high!  Parents, teachers, and those in daily contact with children on school campus’ need to do something to stop it. Children also need to stand together and put an end to bullying. When children see their peers being bullied, the incident needs to be reported or get help. If children band together to address these issues, there will be strength in numbers. By standing together to prevent bullying in every school, the number of bullying incidents can drop along with those incidents of children hurting themselves, and others, because of they fear for their life while attending school.

For more information about how you can help call us at 866-459-7225 or visit our website at http://simpleacts.org

Sources:  NASP   Make Beats, Not Beat Downs

Preventing Bullying in the First Place- Norco, CA

To Prevent Bullying . . .

Intervene when children are young. Children who bully are not born bullies and children who are victimized are not born victims. Many young children engage in aggressive behaviors that may lead to bullying, while others react by submitting to the bullying or even may fight back. Adults can stop these patterns before they are started by encouraging supportive behaviors such as sharing, helping, and problem-solving, and also by putting a stop to aggressive responses such as hostility, hurting, and rejection.

Teach bullying prevention strategies to all  and not just some children. Don’t assume that only “challenging” children become bullies or that only “weak” children become victims. Most children are likely to be victimized by a bully or some type of bullying at some point in their lives. And all children can benefit from learning the difference between acceptable and unacceptable behaviors. How they can stand up for themselves, and others; and when to turn to an adult for help is also very important to learn.

Take bullying seriously. Pay close attention to the warning signs. Make sure children know that bullying will not be tolerated and that you and other adults will assist them in make bullying stop.

Encourage empathy. Children who can empathize understand that bullying hurts not just mentally but also physically. They are less likely to bully and more likely to assist children who are bullied.

Teach by example. Be an effective role model. Children learn how to behave by watching and copying the adults in their lives. Consider how you solve problems, how you discipline, how you control your own anger and disappointment, and how you stand up for yourself and others without fighting. If children observe you acting aggressively, they are more likely to show aggression toward others.

Help children understand media violence. Children may learn aggressive behaviors by watching television and movies that make light of violence.  Playing violent video games that reward violent behavior should be avoided. Help children understand that how the media shows violence is often unrealistic and inappropriate. Intervene when you see children imitating media violence in their daily play or in their social interactions with other children.

Create opportunities for children to learn and practice the qualities and skills that can protect them from bullying.  Children who are confident are less likely to put up with bullying of themselves and others, and are more likely to have the courage and inner-strength to respond in a correct and helpful manner. Children who are assertive know how to react in a bullying situation in a successful, non-aggressive way, and they are less likely to be singled out by bullies in the first place. Children who know how to make and keep friends can look to them for protection from bullying. Children that know how to solve problems constructively can often diffuse a situation that can turn aggressive.

Encourage children to talk about what is happening and report bullying. When they do, listen carefully, and be very patient: Talking about bullying can be difficult, and children may feel embarrassed or scared to share their concerns.  A child that feels judged or feels that they are not being listened is less likely to seek help from an adult.

Develop strong connections with the children you are with.  Children are less likely to bully if they know it will disappoint an adult whom they respect and trust. Likewise, children are more likely to share with an adult a bullying situation if they feel that they have a caring and trusting relationship with that adult.

Take a look at your own beliefs about bulling. Your own misconceptions may prevent you from “seeing or understanding” a potential bullying incident and intervening as quickly as you should.

For more information about how you can help call us at 866-459-7225 or visit our website at http://simpleacts.org