START YOUR MORNING WITH A ROUTINE | SACK of Corona, Ca

“If you’re like the majority of us, your days are planned out even before your head’s off your pillow. Soccer practice, PTA meetings, hitting the gym – the life pie-chart tends to have some pretty small, yet crucial pieces. And, nothing can unravel a day before it even begins better than a rocky, disorganized, frantic morning.

 

GIVE YOURSELF TIME

This one seems like a no-brainer, but it’s imperative. How many times are we tempted to hit the snooze button over and over? Sleep is wonderful, but that last half hour lounging in bed next to a chirping alarm clock won’t make a huge difference. Use that time to get up, make a cup of coffee or catch the morning news before the kids are awake. You’ll be more alert and ready to tackle the day!

 

PREP THE NIGHT BEFORE

Take a moment the night before to help your kids set out clothes for the next day. Prepare food and pack lunches too – that way, it’s just a simple grab-and-go.  Breakfast  can work this way too; consider oatmeal or hard-boiled eggs. Organize backpacks and make sure everything is in there. These little things won’t take you long during the evening, but they can make a huge difference during a busy morning.

 

WRITE IT DOWN

It’s always easier to stay organized when you know what you need to do. Keep a calendar in a central location and keep it updated with appointments and deadlines. Create an age-appropriate chores/responsibilities checklist for the refrigerator to ensure everything you need gets done. And, review these with your kids in the morning. Having all the things you need to know, right in front of you, sets the table for a well-organized day.

 

SET DAILY GOALS

We asked a mom of two young children to shed some light on successful morning routines. She says she likes to talk with her kids about what they want to accomplish that day, and help them set realistic, enjoyable goals. Nothing like starting the day with a positive, constructive spirit!

 

STAY CALM

Finally, don’t sweat it if things don’t do exactly as planned. Sooner or later, your alarm clock will not go off. Your kids will change their minds about outfits set out the night before. Dogs knock over garbage cans, and folders of homework will mysteriously disappear. By having your routine locked into place, you’ll condition yourself to be calm and collected – and folks with those qualities can handle curveballs!”

Read More at…http://www.thechipshoppeblog.com/2014/10/start-your-morning-with-routine-your.html

For more information visit our website at: http://simpleacts.org/

Ideas for an Awesome Day with your Kids | SACK of Corona, Ca

 

“My big girl starts first grade in just over one week.

That delicious feeling at the start of the summer where you have nothing to do and all the time in the world to do it in?

Gone.

In its place, we have 7:00 am departures breathing down our necks. Early bedtime, which means an early dinner, which means next to zero fun free time as a family on weeknights. And…HOMEWORK.

To prolong the magic of summer, I took a day off work during our last week with Abby.

I wanted to do something special with the girls – something with maybe a few less curse words than our last hurrah to summer at the end of my maternity leave last year.

But I didn’t want to swing too far in the other direction of overscheduling us, turning me into That Mom.

“Kids, hurry up! We need to have fun NOW!”

How can you have a wonderfully happy day with your kids, instead of wasting the day in your jammies watching The LEGO Movie and belting out Everything Is Awesome…OR scheduling so much fun that you forget to enjoy yourselves?”

Read more here…http://idealistmom.com/2014/08/happy-day-with-your-kids/#_a5y_p=2273914 

 

For more information visit our website at: http://simpleacts.org/

(Source: Idealistmom.com)

Help your Child Prevent Bullying

As children head back to the classroom, now is a great time for parents and guardians to talk with your kids about bullying. Here are five tips to help your child prevent bullying and to help them deal with bullying:

1)     Establish lines of communication and talk for at least 15 minutes a day. Bullying can be difficult for parents to talk about, but it is important that children know they can talk to you, before they are involved in bullying in any way. StopBullying.gov and our partners at the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) have easy tips and tools that can help start the conversation.

2)     Make sure kids know safe ways to be more than a bystander. When kids witness bullying, it can affect them too. Helping kids learn what they can do to help when they see bullying can help to stop bullying. Click here for more suggestions on how bystanders can help.

3)     Know your state’s anti-bullying law and your school’s anti-bullying policy. Forty-nine states have laws requiring schools to have anti-bullying policies. Know what your school policy says and how to report an incident of bullying if you ever need to.

4)     Learn how to support kids involved in bullying. When you find out your child is involved in bullying, it is important to know how to respond. Whether your child is bullying others or is the one being bullied it is important to know what steps to take, and which to avoid, in order to resolve the situation.

5)     Take an active role in anti-bullying initiatives. The key to addressing bullying is to stop it before it starts. Work with your children, their school, and the community to raise awareness and take action against bullying. Toolkits like the Health Resources and Services Administration’s Community Action Training Modules can help you start an initiative in your community. You can get your children involved, too, by using the Youth Leaders Toolkit to help them mentor younger children.

Visit StopBullying.gov for more helpful tips on how to prevent bullying, and have a great school year!

 

Bullying Facts and Solutions | Corona, CA

Despite all of the media attention that has been given to the mostly tragic consequences of bullying, you simply need to scan the comments sections in on-line articles regarding bullying to sadly see what percentage of adults stay in the dark while not really understanding the negative impact that bullying has on such a large amount of kids on a daily basis.

Below are some of the facts and statistics that we’ve found that make the most important impact on how adults and parents begin to understand bullying as an issue, not just in their community, but also throughout the entire country as well.

Bullying Facts and Statistics

  • 160,000 children within the United States stay home each day due to bullying situations.
  • Eighty-three percent of bullying incidents receive no intervention and continue to happen.
  • Those who bully are four times as likely to participate in criminal behavior in adulthood and frequently develop self-destructive thoughts
  • There are four types of bullying: physical, verbal, cyber,  and social. Male bullying a lot of the time consists of verbal and physical abuse, whereas female bullying a lot of the time involves verbal abuse, cyber, and social bullying by spreading of rumors.
  • Only half of educators have received coaching on the way to handle bullying incidents.  Not teaching educators a way to handle bullying is like not training doctors to treat the flu!
  • Children are additional more likely to receive verbal assaults targeting their appearances and behaviors instead of race or spiritual beliefs.  In several cases, bullies felt that the victim was responsible for these behaviors or appearances.
  • A study by the National School Board Administration reported that 33.1% of the Middle and High School students that participated in the study agreed or strongly agreed that teachers and adults can stop bullying.  This implies that 2/3 of those students don’t seem to be assured that they will get the help they need in bullying situations from their teachers or other adults in power.
  • In 2005, approximately 1 out of 10 internet users aged 10-17 had been the victim of cyber bullying and “on-line harassment”.  Half of victims that were bullied off-line and on-line by one single individual reported being extremely troubled by the incidents.

“If there are no heroes to save you, Then you be the hero”
― Quoted from a Japanese Comic book

Contact Simple Acts of Care and Kindness today at 866-459-7225 or visit our website for more information.

Contact Simple Acts of Care and Kindness proudly serves Norco, Riverside, Lake Elsinore, San Bernardino, Eastvale and surrounding areas.

Mean Girl Bullying…. What adults can do! | Corona, CA

Do schools and teachers pick up on this happening?

Often parents and teachers dismiss the mean girl behavior as part of being a girl.  They often say, “It’s what girls do,” or “Girls will be girls.” Often with younger elementary school girls, parents are not as tuned in to the situation to watch out for this type of behavior because it just seems that the girls are too young for it to be happening to them. But if you talk to teachers, they will tell you they see it on a daily basis.

Many Anti-bullying programs focus only on managing physical aggression, so the issue of mean girls fall outside the scope of the majority of programs. Boys often tend to be more physical, so when there is a fight on the playground with one child being aggressive towards another, there is cause for concern. The school does not want a child physically injured.

Most Anti-bullying programs don’t look at friendship issues, but for girls, that’s where the aggression usually happens.

What can you do when the bully is the girl’s best friend?

If safety is issue and your child is in danger or endangering someone else, get professional help.

Preparing girls for what they might face with a new classroom full of girls is a great idea. Every year there are different  in the classroom. Here are some tips that can help:

  • Start by building strong connections at home. You want to be understanding and a good listener. But that doesn’t mean asking questions that can be leading or suggest that she has been wronged.
  • Validate the range of emotions she is experiencing are valid. Help your daughter understand that all emotions, both positive and negative, are normal.  Remind her that bad emotions don’t make her a bad girl. Try telling her things like, “I understand  how angry you are about what happened. It hurts our feelings when friends are mean.” By allowing your her anger or irritation to play out will help her calm down quicker than if you just play down the situation.
  • Avoid problem-solving for her. You want your daughter to learn how to handle herself in these situations and in life. Be there for her and don’t just tell her what to do. Helping her work through what is going on by asking her questions like, “I understand that your friends are telling everyone that you’re poor and you shop at the thrift store. Why do you think she is she doing that?” Help her understand what is going on in the situation.
  • Try role play to work through the problem. Help by practicing with your daughter her responses to bullying but asking questions like, “Why are you worried about my clothes? If you really are my friend, then why would you be so worried about this?” Help your daughter hold her ground with her own strong but not aggressive statements. Or, if your family has had enough of the situation, a better idea is to start developing new friendships and avoid that “friend.”
  • Work with teachers and school staff. At this young age, girls look up to their teachers and other adults at the school. If they see an exclusion situation happening, sometimes these adults can offer your daughter an opportunity to join him or her for lunch or a special activity to increase her “social value.”

Contact Simple Acts of Care and Kindness today at 866-459-7225 or visit our website for more information.

Contact Simple Acts of Care and Kindness proudly serves Norco, Riverside, Lake Elsinore, San Bernardino, Eastvale and surrounding areas.

The “Mean Girl” bully… No longer just in Middle School | Corona, CA

Kids are starting to heading back to school and one important situation to cover is “mean girlbullying. Typically we think of it as a middle-school issue, but it’s now happening at younger ages. Below we will talk about the problem of young mean girls and how parents can prepare their daughters for more difficult social situations they may face before the school year begins.

What does young mean girl bullying really look like in the first- or second-grade?

Typically it can be cruel words, the spreading of rumors, and systematic teasing. Some parents have said it even started in kindergarten. A study done at SUNY Buffalo in New York concluded that some girls understand these tactics as young as preschool.

Official the term for this is called “relational aggression.” As girls get older and move into third grade, they get more sophisticated and cliques really begin to form. Additionally during this time, you see actions with intent to hurt. Although in kindergarten through second-grade girls, these actions may not be intend to hurt; the girls involved are trying establish their place on the social ladder and often don’t realize that what they are doing is  actually causing pain to others.

One of the most difficult things about this for the younger girls involved is that it can be their best friend who is also their bully. These back and forth friendships can be destructive for the girl who doesn’t know from one day to the next if her friend will play with her, or round up other girls and start a club where she is the only girl that is not allowed to join. Research has shown that the collection of the mean-girl experiences over time can significantly impact a girl’s ability to learn.

See next weeks article on what adults can do to help.

Contact Simple Acts of Care and Kindness today at 866-459-7225 or visit our website for more information.

Contact Simple Acts of Care and Kindness proudly serves Norco, Riverside, Lake Elsinore, San Bernardino, Eastvale and surrounding areas.

Discriminatory harassment and bullying: a definitional sticky wicket? | Corona, CA

Bullying in the news

Part of the confusion arises from the word’s increased popularity and the public’s tendency (fueled by the media) to apply it too broadly. This is what Emily Bazelon, senior Slate legal editor and author of Sticks and Stones, argued in a New York Times op-ed in March: “(The word) is being overused — expanding, accordion-like to encompass both appalling violence or harassment and a few mean words.   The misdiagnosis of bullying is making the real but limited problem seem impossible to solve. If every act of aggression counts as bullying, how can we stop it?”

In a later column in Pyschology Today (March 31), Bazelon drew a distinction between the overused definition of “bullying,” on the one hand, and the consistently clear definition of “discriminatory harassment” under federal discrimination laws. She urged care in “distinguishing discriminatory harassment from other kinds of bullying. In the case of discriminatory harassment (based on race, disability, sex, etc.), the law is clear and so are the definitions. The federal Department of Education wrote a letter to schools reminding them of their obligations in 2010, and it sets out clear guidelines for shielding students from bullying that’s based on what’s really discrimination.”

So, according to Bazelon, the definition of bullying has been abused, but the definition of discriminatory harassment is clear and always has been. This requires some deconstruction.

The standard definition of “bullying” among educators and psychologists comes not from the law but from a Swedish psychologist, Dan Olweus, according to Bazelon. While researching aggression among youth during the 1960s, Olweus identified a whole range of cruel behaviors but found a particularly wounding form of aggression he labeled “bullying.” This behavior had three basic elements: verbal or physical aggression; repetition over time; and a power differential.

“A onetime episode of meanness or violence could be bad in the moment, but it was the repetition and the power imbalance that were most often associated with lasting, scarring impact. Bullying, as Olweus defined it, was the behavior that constituted real abuse in the eyes of the children themselves: a serious rupture in their lives with potentially devastating consequences,” Bazelon wrote.

California law does not contain a definition of prohibited “bullying” conduct, except to the extent that it outlines school findings necessary for the most severe disciplinary consequences, as stated in Education Code section 48900(r). In order to suspend or recommend expulsion, a school must find “bullying” that fits these requirements:

“Severe or pervasive physical or verbal acts or conduct, including communications made in writing or by means of an electronic act … directed toward one or more pupils that has or can be reasonably predicted to have the effect of one or more of the following:

(A) Placing a reasonable pupil or pupils in fear of harm to that pupil’s or those pupils’ person or property.
(B) Causing a reasonable pupil to experience a substantially detrimental effect on his or her physical or mental health.
(C) Causing a reasonable pupil to experience substantial interference with his or her academic performance.
(D) Causing a reasonable pupil to experience substantial interference with his or her ability to participate in or benefit from the services, activities or privileges provided by a school.”

Federal law does not directly address bullying. However, both California and federal law prohibit “harassment” of students based on legally protected attributes (race, sex, disability, etc.). “Harassment” is defined as conduct that creates a “hostile environment” that limits students from participating or benefiting from school activities or services and can include conduct that might also be considered “bullying” under the Olweus or other definitions.

California Education Code section 48900.4 provides that the school may suspend or recommend for expulsion students in grades 4 to 12 when the school has determined that “the pupil has intentionally engaged in harassment, threats or intimidation, directed against school district personnel or pupils, that is sufficiently severe or pervasive to have the actual and reasonably expected effect of materially disrupting classwork, creating substantial disorder, and invading the rights of either school personnel or pupils by creating an intimidating or hostile educational environment.”

While “harassment” conduct may overlap with what is known as “bullying,” it is not the same as bullying. The concept of bullying is based on a psychological construct designed to identify the most emotionally harmful behavior; by contrast, harassment is a legal construct designed to protect certain students from discrimination. Harassment, which may include bullying, may also include conduct outside the standard definition of bullying; for example, harassment under federal law does not need to be directed at a specific target, is not necessarily motivated by intent to harm and is not always repeated.

The preceding is a recent story posted on the website Palo Alto Online dated June 14,  2013.  Use this link to read the story in its entirety.

For more information about how you can help call us at 866-459-7225 or visit our website at http://simpleacts.org

S.A.C.K. also proudly serves Norco, Corona, Lake Elsinore, San Bernardino, Eastvale, and surrounding areas.

Blackboard develops anonymous texting hotline to report bullying | Corona, CA

Bullying in the news

By Rebecca Forand/South Jersey Times

In the ever-increasing fight against bullying at the elementary and high school level, Blackboard, an education technology company, has introduced a way for students to anonymously text in reports.

Blackboard Inc.’s TipTxt program is aimed at young students who have moved to texting as their main form of communication. The confidential texts will be routed to school officials who use the program.

While Blackboard is used in nearly half the schools in the country, in this area it is mostly at the post-secondary level, but local educators believe this type of program is something that could be beneficial at the middle and high school levels.

At the Deptford school district, which goes from kindergarten through 12th grade, there is an anonymous call-in system for bullying incidents, as well as suicide prevention, vandalism and any other offenses students want to report, but a texting program is one that the administration would look into.

“Especially as the kids get older you see a lot of hesitance to go out and report things,” said Matt Huminski, the district’s bullying coordinator. “To have an avenue where a student who may be afraid to be seen in the assistant principal or principal’s office, I think it’s very important.

Huminski said TipTxt is something he would look into in order to give the students one more way to report what they witness.

“I’m always trying to look out for different things that will be effective for our students,” he said. “A texting program would be a great additional step. That’s the level they are at now, they are always texting.”

A similar program is already in use at the Clearview Regional middle and high school district. An 800 number has been set up to accept text messages from students regarding bullying incidents, and while it doesn’t garner much use, the few tips it has received have helped the administration enforce its HIB (harassment, intimidation, bullying) rules.

“You never know who you’re going to help,” Clearview Superintendent John Horchak said. “Anything that has the opportunity to limit, eliminate or decrease HIB would be a benefit and we’d certainly look at it.”

For more information about how you can help call us at 866-459-7225 or visit our website at http://simpleacts.org

S.A.C.K. also proudly serves Norco, Corona, Lake Elsinore, San Bernardino, Eastvale, and surrounding areas.

There are 5 reasons kids may not ask for help when being bullied | San Bernardino, CA

Most people reading this information right now know a child who has stayed home from school this week because they were afraid of being bullied – but you may not realize it. The estimations are that an average of 160,000 students around the country stay home daily out of fear of being bullied each day. But adults, for many of reasons, have no idea that the bullying is taking place.

For those parents and adults who may be wondering why the children are not telling them that they are bullied, there are 5 universal reasons:

  1. They have been taught not to tattle and often think that they are tattling on the bully. It is vitally important that children learn the difference between tattling about unimportant things and telling someone when bullying is taking place.
  2. Children may fear retaliation especially if they tell an adult they are being bullied. While the adult may be able to address the issue with the child doing the bullying, there will probably be another time right around the corner when the adult is there to help. Children may fear that things could escalate if the issue is addressed.
  3. Some children feel that they will not be listened to and that the issue will not be believed. They think that they will tell an adult and that person will not believe them or will suggest that maybe they did something to bring the bullying on themselves.
  4. A majority of children believe that telling an adult does nothing to stop the bullying. Sadly, research tends to support this thought. Many adults don’t do anything about the bullying, or they simply brush it off.  Often kids are told to “toughen up”, or “that it is just a part of growing up”. If children learn that adults won’t help, then they are not very likely to report the incidents.
  5. When children are bullied, they often feel ashamed or embarrassed. These feelings alone can keep them from reporting issues, because they don’t want people to know that they were being bullied.

Around half children who are being bullied don’t end up telling an adult that it’s happening. The more we as parents and adults can understand about the issues and address the reasons behind them not telling, the easier it will be to help solve the bullying problem our nation’s children and schools facing.

The challenges that children face when not telling adults that they are being bullied can be dealt with and defeated. This can happen by having a bully prevention program in place in every school, as well as parents and adults talking to children about bullying and the importance of telling someone in authority when it happens. It is also vitally important that when children do tell adults about bullying that it is addressed in a positive manner so that they feel confident in their decision to report it the next time it happens.

Bullying builds character like nuclear waste creates superheroes. It’s a rare occurrence and often does much more damage than endowment.”
― Zack W. Van, Author

For more information about how you can help call us at 866-459-7225 or visit our website at http://simpleacts.org

4 Easy Steps We Can All Take To Stop Bullying | San Bernardino, CA

To begin to foster a society of caring, respect, and awareness starts with a few steps that are simple but can make the biggest change possible.

1. Increasing Your Own Awareness

Recognizing when bullying is taking place is an important first step in finding solutions.  By understanding the reason and roots of the problem, you will begin to form an idea of how to start proactively working to address bullying.  This includes teasing, name-calling, shunning, and physical intimidation or assault.  Does your school, sports club, or youth group create a culture of respect, caring, and safety for everyone?  Are children supervised appropriately during recess, lunch and before and after school?  Do educators and staff have adequate support and training for addressing bullying and recognize the different forms that bullying can appear as?

2. Respond To Situations Forcefully but Respectfully

When you see bullying taking place or hear about it, remember that your reactions provide a framework for how the kids involved will respond to and understand the situation.  Children need to see adults being powerful and respectful in reacting to problems.  If adults in charge get upset and overreact, children are more likely to imitate adult actions and might even avoid telling adults about future situations.  Staying calm, respectful, and persistent will make you more effective in talking to children in bullying situations.

3. Teach Your Kids Defensive Skills

Positive peer to peer relationship skills help to put a stop to bullying.  Teach children that they have the confidence and power to walk away from any situation.  They can make safe choices like stepping out of a line or changing seats.  Sometimes all that is needed to make bullying problem stop.  Ensure that your child is active in getting help and is prepared to continue to ask for help even if an adult does not respond immediately to the situation.

4. Become Involved

Keep yourself informed as to what other parents and adults in your community are doing to stop bullying.  Insist that your child’s school and school district has a mandatory district-wide anti-bullying policy and that they educate their staff on how to stop bullying and recognizing all forms and types of youth bullying.  Write to your county- and state-level officials and tell them of the seriousness of bullying and demand they make it a top priority in their campaigns.

“I would rather be a little nobody, then to be a evil somebody.”
― Abraham Lincoln

For more information about how you can help call us at 866-459-7225 or visit our website at http://simpleacts.org